STORM HITS ROYAL TOUR
Rain hammers Antigua and Barbuda. Queen Camilla vanishes under a transparent umbrella within seconds, while King Charles, in his linen suit, stands there like a freshly watered flowerbed. The national anthem forbids all movement, so nobody stirs. At least the humour stays dry: cress, he quips, will soon be sprouting on his suit.

Chaos in Washington
The White House press secretary quits, calling herself a “useless idiot”. At the Kremlin, the press secretary remains in post—and calls himself a “useful idiot”.

MAN CITY IN CHEATING SHOCK
Football special: Manchester City face accusations of cheating after an alleged tactical trick. A new “defender” is reportedly deployed in an unexpected No. 10 role, creating a move that leaves football fans and rule-makers equally astonished.

ROYALS ROCKED BY SPENCER MEMOIR
Earl Spencer turns Diana's memory into a book deal, preaching acceptance – of his own payday. Charles calls AI a terrifying existential threat at a tech summit, but really means Di. An interview goes off the rails as he brands himself a "callous, disloyal bastard." Camilla's book club recommends nothing this month.

BUMPER SUMMER FUN SPECIAL
A satirical summer special taking sharp aim at UK politics, the climate emergency, budget debates, migration and the rising cost of living. Includes cartoons on election campaigning, transport projects and high-profile politicians, plus a prize quiz with £250 worth of prizes.